Millennials Need More Friends
For Millennials and all my former students working hard
I was watching some videos from Gabor Maté and he was talking about how some of the youngest generations (millennials and gen-z) are only socializing within their own generation.
I have not looked at this deeply, but I have noticed that my millennial friends and colleagues seem to live in a sort of professional echo chamber. Asking people questions in social media seems to have taken the place or self directed research and inquisition.
When I was a youngster I felt like I had a lively social circle. I was always busy and trying to balance work and play. However, when it came to work, and getting professional advice, I knew that my friends were kind of useless.
Some of them were, in hindsight, genius level thinkers. However, their life experience equated to mine. Any advice we gave one another was statistically unsound, we were guessing.
I knew this. I found older professionals to mentor with in order to learn technology, public speaking, handling customers, martial arts, cooking, and more.
Overtime, I started mentoring people when I could. I always felt like this was a good way to keep a connection with the younger generation and test my skills by teaching others.
In 2017, I started mentoring a millennial who I felt then, and still believe, is a genius. I noticed that many of things we were learning together were very new to them. It was like everything I had read, people I mentioned, etc were nearly 100% foreign. Yet, I knew most the references the millennial made.
Some of my good friends at the time were significantly older than I was, and the millennial thought this was very weird. Overtime, they realized that these people were not only funny, but had real answers to real problems.
I decided to pry a bit into my younger co-workers social life. I found out that nearly 100% of their friends were millennials. I found out that in university, my friend did participate in internships, but with other millennials. I am not sure how that works.
There was a point around 2018 when I took a macro view of my workplace.
I realized that there were about ten millennials who all seemed to have this similar pattern. Within this pattern, these ten people also seemed to be the ones who really needed support with things like banking, investing money, making travel plans, etc.
I realized that when it came to getting information, instead of connecting with someone who was more experienced, or doing research, the millennials would ask their friends on social media; their friends who were also mostly millennials with the exact same life experience.
My anecdotes are only representing my life, and I am sure that Gabor Maté an I are probably over stating the problem. However, for millennial readers out there, if you are not happy, not being successful, need some guidance, or want to learn anything new, consider “asking-up”.
If you want to build a solid skill-stack that empowers you to make meaningful changes in your life, you need to connect with people who have had a life.
Most of the things you need to learn will take time, and a mentor who has done what you want to do, is going to give you an advantage.
Mentors with stories of failure, are just as valuable as those with stories of success.
The millennial I recently mentored will surpass my accomplishments in half the time. They currently have a more diverse group of co-workers and friends and have chosen a path most of their social media peers don’t even understand.
That, makes me happy.
If, as millennial, you need help learning to reach out to new and seemingly anonymous people, let me know.
You don’t need Facebook or Twitter to introduce yourself. I am happy to help get you started engaging with the Gen-Y and Gen-X people who are all around you and want to expand their network.
PS: Don’t say “OK Boomer” to Gen-X people, it’s annoying. :)
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Why is this SubStack called, Pancake on a Stick?
Pancake on a Stick is the single funniest story I have ever heard in my life. In about a year from now, the event will be reenacted and recorded. I named the SubStack after the story, because every time I think of the name, I smile and laugh. This helps with my writing and tone, and makes me always remember the most important things in life.
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Most social media is dead to me, but you can find me on LinkedIn and Youtube.
LinkedIn (A bastion of boredom but mostly on mission)
https://www.linkedin.com/in/tdeprato/
Email
info@tonydeprato.com
My video series on Expat Recruitment is BORING but useful Listen or Watch and you can master this process.